JOY

J.O.Y.

Each year I make the traditional New Year’s resolutions. To name a few . . .

Live a healthier lifestyle.

Serve God.

Love People.

Spend more time in the Word.

No doubt, they are all good ideas. But, I rarely can remember what I did yesterday, so I can never remember exactly what I decided I’d do to make the New Year better than the previous.

This year, I couldn’t even think of anything. Well, I kept thinking about them, but never made a commitment or really saw the point, since I knew I’d soon forget.

So, I did what I should have done every year for the past 26 … I prayed about it.

As I prayed I kept finding that my prayers led me to one word … JOY.

This past year (2011) was full of ups and downs, to be cliché, a rollercoaster. As I thought back on it, I could hardly remember all that it had encompassed. What did I even do last summer? (Like I said, I can barely remember what I did yesterday.)

Instead of focusing on all the commitments I’ve made in past years and never fulfilled I decided that my prayers had led me to something new, the word, JOY.

This year my focus will be on JOY. In particular, finding my JOY in One …

1 King

1 Child born in a manger

1 Son of God

1 Prince of Peace

1 Great I Am

I realized that if throughout the year I simply focus on placing my JOY in Jesus then everything else will fall into place. All of those other, traditional New Year’s resolutions will probably happen without my even realizing it.

Here’s a little background on how I came to this revelation:

In 2011 I found that teaching wasn’t my passion, in fact, I’d lost the passion. I wanted to pursue something new; I thought pursuing it in another country I’d find the joy in it. Well, that didn’t work.

As I’ve looked at 2011 I realize that it has been one of the most stressful of my life, or perhaps I should say, could have been the most stressful of my life.

I currently make probably a similar amount of money to what I made in high school, but I’ve found contentment resting in the blessed assurance. I have no clue where my life is going, or what I will be doing 2 weeks from now. But, I’m still living with a smile on my face. I have no place to live but being a nomad has been a freeing of sorts. I gave up the majority of my worldly goods, only to find, they never meant anything to me anyway.

I’ve realized in the “roller coaster” of the past 12 months, God has continually been showing me, HE is all I need. I’ve prayed for it, longed for it, hoped for it, & dreamed of it but I never really got it. I’m certainly ashamed to admit it took loosing it all to find the one simple thing I needed … JOY in Jesus!

No house, no car, no job, no money, no idea where I’m going, yet, I found JOY.

Now, I don’t want to leave you thinking I’m destitute. I’ve found places to stay, I’ve purchased a new car, I have a job. But at some point throughout the year of 2011 I’ve faced all of those difficulties & yet haven’t really felt the stress of loosing it all. All I can say to that is … My God is faithful.

I certainly hope I don’t have to face all of those things again in 2012, I’d rather not have to. But I’m simply going to find my JOY in Jesus through them all over again if that’s what He’s chosen for me.

Even though I’m no longer a teacher, I found that even defining “JOY in Jesus” as my theme for the upcoming year, I needed an acrostic for the word JOY. While driving today, I kept prying with God to provide me with something … this is what popped into my mind.

J Jesus

O Overseeing

Y You

As I thought about this more, as corny as it might seem, if Jesus is overseeing me, how could I not find JOY. Jesus overseeing my daily actions, my daily worries, my daily cares, my daily stresses, if Jesus is overseeing all of it, I have nothing left to do but find the JOY in the situation.

It reminds me that in those silly little moments when I’m at risk of letting the world take control I need to stop and …

Psalms 47:1 Clap your hands, all peoples! Shout to God with loud songs of joy!

For I always have this as my strength…

Nehemiah 8:10 Then he said to them, “Go your way. Eat the fat and drink sweet wine and send portions to anyone who has nothing ready, for this day is holy to our Lord. And do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

Here goes 2012 …

1 Year into her Reign

One Year into her Reign as Princess

One year ago today . . .

My brother became Daddy

My sister-in-law became Mommy

My Mom became 2Gran

& I became AUNT Shannon

One of the best year’s ever. But, let me start from the beginning . . .

One year ago yesterday I got a panicked phone call from my older brother. As soon as I picked up the phone I heard, “GO TO THE HOSPITAL, NOW!” Knowing that it was almost time for the arrival of a new baby into the family I had a feeling this was the reason I was going to the hospital. Trying to calm him (something I rarely have to do, in fact it’s typically the opposite, him giving me the “chill out” talk). I’m not sure I responded in the best way but I said, “Is there something going on?” His response, “SHANNON, DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK I’D BE CALLING YOU IF THERE WASN’T SOMETHING GOING ON!?!” I knew then I just needed to get to the hospital. He tells me to go to St. Joe on Harrodsburg Road, thankfully I was close by, as my house is only a few miles away. However, I arrived at St. Joe to some interesting news. There’s no labor and delivery unit at St. Joe. I call Michael back, he says, “No, no, no, go to St. Joe EAST.” If you’re familiar with Lexington, I had to get to the entirely opposite side of town, & it just so happened to be very close to 5PM, nonetheless, off I go.

I pull into the parking lot, see my Dad’s truck and my cousin Douglas. Michael has apparently called both of them panic stricken as well. However, as I get out of my car I ask, “why are you just standing in the parking lot?” Well, we can’t find her!?! Ohh no, hospital number 2 & still no sister-in-law. Calling Michael again I say, we’ve been to St. Joe and St. Joe East, any other ideas? At this point it becomes a little funny. He is clueless to say the least, so I call my sister-in-law. A last resort, considering she’s in labor, but if I don’t call her it’s likely I’ll be driving all over Lexington for the remainder of the evening, rather than get to where I need to be. Thankfully she answers and we find out we’re actually suppose to be at Central Baptist. Another trip across Lexington & we’re finally at the right hospital. Moments after converging at the right hospital we find my sister-in-law and I call my brother to let him know we’ve made it.

Upon answering the phone my brother says, “PLEASE TELL ME YOU’VE FOUND THE RIGHT HOSPITAL THIS TIME!” In fact, we finally did, not in thanks to you though. J Michael then continues his ranting on the phone, “I CAN’T FIND THIS BAG!?!” My response, “What bag, Michael?” “Katie wants some bag! Who needs a bag to have a baby!?! I don’t understand, why am I looking for some flippin’ bag!?!” Trying to remain calm & not bust out laughing at the panicked state my brother is in (This is a rare occasion, so it’s ok that I laugh at him about it.), I explain to him that there are things a person needs while in the hospital preparing for a baby, and in order to bring the baby home. Eventually he finally came across the bag he was supposed to be finding and then began to make his way to the hospital.

After arriving at the hospital the prominent conversation was, boy or girl? My brother and his wife did not find out what they were having, so of course, at this moment, we’re all making our last minute bets on what it could be!?! My answer: “No clue!”

Katie and I had been sitting in her room for quite a while when my phone rings, my brother was calling. I step outside to answer (thankfully) and answer to , “I CAN’T FIND THE HOSPITAL!” Me: “What!?!” Michael: “Shannon, I know it’s right here, but I can’t find it! Help me!” Yet again caught in the predicament of, trying to remain calm but wanting to bust out laughing at the same time, I say, “Ever been to Commonwealth Stadium?” Michael: “Duh, Shannon!” Me: “Act like you’re driving to a football game at Commonwealth but before you get to the right turn, there’s the hospital.” Michael: “I FOUND IT!” Me: Hang up the phone, bust out laughing! As a little sister to someone who is fearless, there have been few moments in my life when I can laugh at my brother’s panicked state, so I took full advantage.

Katie was only in the beginning stages of labor so later that evening I went home to get a few hours of shut eye before welcoming the new Marshall baby into the family the next day. When we were making bets about the gender of the baby my response was, “no clue!” That all changed in my few hours of sleep before coming back to the hospital. That night I had a dream, about a little girl with black curly hair. I walked into the waiting room the next morning and announced to everyone, “it’s a girl & she has black curly hair!” Being the sole person who continuously said, “no clue” on the baby gender question throughout Katie’s pregnancy, my family was quite shocked when I was so certain of my answer. That night I had fallen asleep praying for this new little one who would be entering the world and had a dream that it was a girl, I was certain now.

Hours later, the time drawing nearer, everyone was still making last minute bets in the waiting room on what the gender of the baby was, I stood firm, girl. Katie’s Dad went back to stand close to hear the news the moment the baby arrived into the world. Moments later, we hear footsteps running down the hall, it’s Frank, he ambushes into the waiting room, “IT’S A GIRL!!!” Just steps behind him is my brother, he looks straight at me, “SHANNON!!” Me: “What?” Michael: “IT’S A GIRL WITH BLACK CURLY HAIR!!!” I gave my brother a big hug then ran back to meet the new addition.

Mary Emily Marshall entered the world on November 9, 2010. Now, let me tell you, on November 8^th, 2010, as my sister-in-law sat in a hospital bed in labor I told her, “I don’t do babies.” Well, for the past 365 days I have eaten those words and will continue to do so for the rest of my life.

There’s one precious treasure, a baby girl who changed my entire thinking and world. After she arrived and the nurses whisked her off to the nursery I followed them. I stood outside the nursery window and watched her every move. Three and half hours later, someone walked up to me & said, “Are you ok?” Me: “Yes, why?” Well, you’ve been standing here for nearly four hours! What!?! No way! I had stood staring at a precious baby girl for three & a half hours! THREE & A HALF HOURS!

I’m thankful God gave me a special reason to eat the words, “I don’t do babies.” This year has proven to me that I am crazy about a special little girl. She is worth the eating of my words and a whole lot more.

Here are a few of the things I love most about my Mary Emily:

· her giggles

· the way she makes her Mommy & Daddy so happy

· her snuggles

· her fierce independence

· her opinionated sassy nature (even at one J)

· watching her grow

· her enthusiasm for life

· her smile

· watching her learn new things

Mary Emily is a sweet treasure, one that will always be the reason I went from Shannon to Aunt Shannon. I treasure every moment I am able to spend with her, and always crave more. Being an aunt is by far the greatest blessing I have known.

As an Aunt there are a few things I will always want Mary Emily to know:

· the love of Jesus

· the joy of giving

· that no matter where the road leads, I will always love her

· that sometimes a simple smile can go a long way

· that I’m always happy to listen

· that her faith will take her on great journeys

I know I’m not this precious little girls Mom or Dad but I can say, I’ve never known a love as great or deep as the love I have for this little girl. I can’t thank my brother and sister-in-law enough for the time they’ve allowed me to treasure their sweet little girl.

Throughout this year I’ve reflected on my own life and who I am or becoming. I have, more than once, through prayer asked God to let His light shine through me. As I watch this sweet little one grow, I think of how much I desire her to know the love of Jesus and how I want to be a representation of the love Jesus has for His children. I find myself taking steps back and thinking more deeply about simple things, as I want to make decisions that I’d be proud of Mary Emily for making. I hope that God will show himself through me, as there’s nothing I long for this little princess to know more than the love of her heavenly King.

Mary Emily – you are the greatest blessing I have ever known. I love you more everyday and it excites me to know that God has laid out your every step. I’m so grateful to have the opportunity to be your Aunt. I love you to the moon and back sweet princess!

Conversations with Kindergarteners

Substitute teaching hasn't made me want to rejoin the teaching field but it sure provides for some great laughs. Teaching kindergarteners is always entertaining . . .

Student: I'm going to see my Grandma for Fall Break!

Me: Ohh Great! Where does your Grandma live?

Student: (with a serious look on their face) Somewhere

Me: Ohh wow! That sounds like a great place.

Student: Yeah!

Student: I can't wait until I'm 16! (Note: student is currently 5.)

Me: Really?

Student: Yes, I'm going to buy a Range Rover.

Me: Wow! I hope you have lots of $ saved up.

Student: I do! I have a blue piggy bank & a white one!

Student's were asked to draw a picture of their favorite thing about Fall.

Me: What is that?

Student: Darth Vader

Me: What does that have to do with Fall?

Student: I'm going to be Darth Vader for Halloween & that's in the Fall.

Me: Great logic. :)

Finding a New Normal

Normal doesn't typically describe my life. Nor does it now either. I've been back from Africa for a few weeks, purchased a new car, living at random places, & finding a job. Many of you have asked, what's going on, so here's a brief update . . .

I'm working ... all the time. I am currently subbing in Scott County. Thanks to the quick admissions process of some wonderful people there I was able to jump right into subbing when I returned. I've been called everyday & have spent the majority of my days at Southern (where I taught last year).

I also have a job at Homewood Suites by Hilton in Lexington. Do I like it? No. Do I love it? YES! I simply walked in one Thursday, handed them my resume, got offered an interview Friday, & began working the following Tuesday. I'm completely blessed that God opened this door to work with such a fun group of people. I love being able to say my job is fun! Really, it's fun! I work here in the evenings, after I sub. My typical shift will be from 3-11PM.

I'm also starting a 3rd job soon at Baby Bundles, just part time, here and there. I'm happy to be beginning this as well. This is a shop that sells baby clothing in Lexington Green.

I did buy another car. Everyone has been asking, were you sad that you sold your other car? My response: do you know me? I obviously love change, having to go car shopping did not hurt my feelings one bit. I'm now the happy owner of a Toyota Camry & I LOVE it!

As for my condo. I have wonderful renters whom I'm super thankful for! I can only hope that they are enjoying living there. As for when their lease is up...well, that's a long time away & I'm in no way ready to make a decision about what I will do then. So, for now, thanks to them! I appreciate knowing it is well taken care of. :)

Now the question everyone has been asking....are you missing teaching? & in fact my answer is .... no. Yes, you heard me correctly, I'm not missing teaching. I currently have no plans to go back into the field. Obviously life has not been what I expected so I dare not say I will never be a teacher again, but as for now I'm perfectly happy not being one & don't plan to look for a full-time position anytime in the near future. My entire former classroom is stuffed into a storage unit & I don't plan on opening the door anytime soon. If next fall I still decide that I have no desire to pursue a teaching career, then I will open the door & allow all of my fellow teacher friends to dig in. :)

A brief glimpse into the life I live ... & currently love. :)

Blessings sweet friends!

Operation Re-Do!

Umm ... let's just say life certainly has some unexpected events, obstacles, turns & twists. I'm back in the USA, figuring out where to go from here. After some bumps in the road in Tanzania I decided it was best to terminate my contract. I'm thankful that I did but now completely lost & confused on where to go from here. There's no need for any long, drawn out explanation, things just didn't work out. I'm currently in the great (incredibly HOT) state of Texas, visiting family. I'll be flying back to KY on Monday to begin the job search. I suppose it's only right that I change the title of my blog to "Lost & Confused" rather than "Teacher Traveler" since I am neither at this point in my life. Right now I'm not really interested in stepping back into the education realm but ready to pursue other options and interest. However, I'm also open to the idea that the job market isn't exactly wonderful & I need to be open minded about where I could end up. Just resting in the fact that even though I thought my life was all figured out & I'd be 1/2 way around the world for at least 2 years I'm simply clueless as to where my life is going or what I'm suppose to be doing. So, here's to new beginnings & finding a new path in life . . .

Questioning

Thank you again for all of your sweet encouragement as I decide what to do with my future. I have had a great experience here so far. I have a great apartment (minus the no hot water thing, haha!) & a great roommate. I've enjoyed seeing the city thus far and the few people I've met that I will be working with have been great. Stacey & I were even able to have a few relaxing hours on the beach today, which I wanted to use to hopefully clear my mind & rejuvenate my heart!

I simply question whether my heart is in teaching, which many of you know I've questioned a lot. I'm praying through the wave of emotions that have hit me within the last 24-48 hours. I only want to give students my best & if my best isn't here then I'm not willing to put them through my regrets.

I have told my wonderful friend Stacey & director that I will be making a decision within the next 48 hours as to what I will be doing, whether that be continuing on with this journey or finding a new road. Lots of conflicted feelings right now but I know God has a sweet plan for such a crazy mixed up heart like mine. I simply hope that my prayers & heart will focus on His plan & be at peace with whatever He should ask me to do.

I appreciate all your friendly & wonderful insight! You are great people with tremendous hearts.

Love you all!

Today is Rough

So, today I was super pumped about seeing my classroom & visiting our school. I wish I could say that I ended the day on just as good of a note.

I'm tremendously grateful for all of your prayers of well wishes & your sweet comments as today I've had a "pity" day. I saw my classroom, but it is not yet finished. My classroom was the former art teacher's classroom. It was not what I expected.

Well . . . maybe I should just say today is a day that has made me realize all the things I'm grateful for back home. A place I thought I wanted to give up, now there's nowhere else I'd rather be. It's crazy how coming 1/2 way around the world showed me that a Saturday night sitting with the sweetest princess in the world, is a huge blessing. That even though I can't stand packing, moving, & unpacking a bazillion boxes every school year, at least I have those things to help make my classroom what it is. My furniture might have splotches & cuts but I have a great home. That although I do not always show them the love & respect that I should I have great family and friends.

I'm struggling today . . . & hoping & praying that the days get better. :) Thanks for your prayers too!